The celebrations continue, although I did have to work with the visiting nurse yesterday to drain the fluid.  It actually hurt more than I expected.  Makes me a little "nervous" about what lies ahead – but it-is-what-it-is and Jesus will be with me.  I have to remember to ask for his support.

Last night we had a dinner at a restaurant for Regina for her birthday.  It was wonderful to see Tanya, Danny, Regina, and Joseph along with Darren and I.  I look to see where Jesus was at the restaurant, but I couldn't see his face but I knew that he brought us together.  That all these people and relationships and our life are designed by our almighty father and sometimes we fail to understand  that the Good Lord has put this world into existence.  None of this can happen without his will.

It snowed a lot today, and Darren is still asleep.  I'd truly fear being a burden on him; he has been very good about keeping things together and providing the support and framework that I need right now.  I've been able to focus on family and work and just being sort of lazy.  I hope I can get to church today.  We'll see how bad the snow is and if it can get cleared, it is supposed to keep getting worse for the next two days.  I'm still struggling with how much to let people know it work and they only have a few more weeks before the sabbatical starts so I just want to stay below the radar and not let people know what's going on at this point.

I hope to continue reading the "life of Christ" by Fulton sheen today getting to understand how the Lord plays into our history.  Last night I did read about the tremendous awesomeness of having God step into the world that he's created.  I can't really get my head around it, but I understand the uniqueness of human civilization and the tremendous power that God has imbued in all of our lives.  I hope to it more understanding today.

Last night's sleep was difficult; my side was hurting and sometimes I wonder if there isn't some internal swelling.  It's not that I can't live with this, I realize that only the beginning and that is what scares me.  But I also am not the first person to have suffered and arguably I have suffered very little physically in my life.  I hope to have the courage and grace handle my life and body as things comes up a head.  I was feeling sad looking at the family and knowing that I might not be part of it for much longer.  But I also do not want to be a sign of depression to everybody else.  God please help me to have the grace and peace and understanding that I need this point.